christmas fling

- we cannot be on first name basis. you can call me any other thing you feel like but just not my name, that breeds some kinda insane familiarity that i really dont want to have with you.

- we go out when and if i want to. you make the calls ofcourse but i get to say 'yes' or 'no'.

- you only talk to me if i acknowledge you, if i go out and see you and decide to pretend like ive never seen you in my life before then you better go along with it.

- i dont care if you have a girlfriend...dont just tell me you have one even if you do.

- dont get emotional with me..cos seriously, this is just plain fun for me and i dont want any attachments after this.

- dont ever call me..you can only text me to tell me where and when to meet you and thats it. this is no relationship..its a fling.

- this is called a fling..so when i feel like ive been flung hard enough...then you can scooch.

- no stolen kisses...thats just for lovers.

- no christmas gifts, boxing day gifts...im not spending a dime on you and i'd really appreciate it if you didnt make me feel guilty by spending some on me.

- restaurants are not really a place to have a fling..i mean...that encourages conversation and that breeds familiartiy...a club..now thats a good place i can get 'flung' at.

- i don't want to meet your friends and you are definitely never going to meet mine.

- dont ask me to go to church with you..i already feel guilty already, im not going to the house of God and flaunting it there.

- if you think taking me to church and talking sweetly about your mum will make me think of what a sweet boy you are, forget it..ive met sweeter people.

- this rendezvous will be that part of my life i'd look back on and think..'ooh,that ended well'.

- when i leave...it ends on that day. i dont want to see your number on my phone..no calls..no messages...no nothing.

- if i meet you somewhere else..we behave like new acquaintances.

now, if you can just take the pen and sign the damn contract then we can be on our way to a very memorable christmas fling.

p.s: if there is any breach whatsoever in our contract...i get to humiliate you..you really dont want to be subjected to my kind of humiliation.

no, im not getting flung..just wondering what it will be like to give myself a little gift for being so good this year, since father christmas doesnt seem to be doing his job properly.lol.kidding oh!!!

merry christmas folks.

on a whole other matter, nigerians need to get off cnn and change the channel and stop acting all guilty..im tired of talking to friends and they start telling me about the nigerian bomber...bitch, i have something better to discuss with you. the guy's father warned the US embassy and they ignored him...they ignored a whole former ist bank chairman.seriously?
now that this shit has happened..they now have a whole bunch of crap to say and nigerians are buying into it..seriously.nigerians need to learn to stop caring about things like this...the boy didnt even go to school in nigeria..he wasnt even living there, the bastard sneaked into nigeria just to use his passport... and nigerians are acting all guilty. abeg, noone else should call my phone asking if ive heard about the bomber...im seriously going to curse the next fool that'd do that.