Friday, February 26, 2010

no friends allowed here.


i was talking to a couple of persons and the discussion veered to what kind of people we choose as friends.
and i thought i should share what my list of requirements are.
these are traits i cant stand in friends:

- i cant be friends with a bossy person- i cant stand bossy individuals, they are so stupidly opinionated and think they have a right to order your every move. when i see my friends put up with bossy friends i physically cringe.

- stupidly sensitive people: now, when my friends are broke i always call them poor people and vice versa..so i cant stand some very low esteemed person carrying stupid face for me cos i called the person poor.

- gossips: i dont want to be friends with someone who ill tell something and the next day i'd hear everyone talking about it and she'd say..'it just slipped out'. what kinda story is that one? thats why i must know you for a period of time before i can even call you my friend..some mistakes people make is calling me their friend when i only think of them as an acquaintance.

- malice keepers: now, i went to school in nigeria, i was very popular in high school so trust me when i say im very good at ignoring people and not talking to them for a very long period of time..i dont have a problem with it. but i think some people are very incredibly stupid and insistent on keeping malice just cos of a stupid argument or a very little problem. you are not my friend if i cannot argue with you and know that it wont affect our friendship. i feel like standing up and telling people 'LET IT GO WILL YOU?'. im very good at letting stuff go so i want people who i call friends to be like that too.

- one-boy-crazy: now, i dont have any problems with you being boy crazy, almost all my friends are boy crazy, i dont have any problems with you pining for a boy..it happens to the best of it, i dont have any problems with you getting heartborken esp. if the likeness was mutual but it just didnt work out but what i cant stand is when you know for sure that a guy doesnt like you again and you try so hard to impress hima nd side him in every damn thing..its like dude wake up and smell the coffee.
lol..my co-worker who i was discussing this list with was the one who mentioned this one and i was like..that is so true.

- liars: i'd rather you not tell me something than lie to me. say i dont want to tell you instead of lying to me. i cant stand people who lie. i just cant.

- low-self esteem: i cant stand being friends with someone i have to prop up all the time..i cant. i dont have the time to waste on you and your self- image issues. there was this girl i knew in highschool who was always crying about how guys dont like her cos shes not pretty...now, this girl is a very pretty girl oh but because guys never chyked her when she looked in the mirror she saw an ugly person looking back at her..i had to convince her through out high school and even convinced some boys in my ss3 to ask her out. this is a type of friendship i never in my life want to have again.

okay, im tired. i want you guys to tell me two things that you cannot tolerate and you cant be friend with people who have that trait.
please leave a comment i really want to know.

AFTER READING A COUPLE OF COMMENTS..I JUST WANT TO BE CLEAR THAT..THIS LIST HERE ARE THE QUALITIES THAT I CANNOT COMPROMISE ON...I DONT WANT SOMEONE WHO LIES TO ME, OR GOSSIPS WITH MY NAME OR CANT LET THINGS GO.ITS NOT LIKE I WANT MY FRIENDS TO BE PERFECT..I JUST DONT WANT THEM TO BE LIKE THE LIST ABOVE.AND WHEN I SAY I PICK MY FRIENDS I JUST MEAN THAT WHEN I COME ACROSS A CERTAIN GROUP OF PEOPLE AND I START RELATING WITH THEM AFTER A CERTAIN PERIOD OF TIME,I GET CLOSE TO SOME AND WE BECOME FRIENDS.JUST WANTED TO CLARIFY WHAT THIS POST IS ABOUT.

p.s: by the grace of God, im moving into a new apartment in the fall and im going to miss my roommate so much. we might not be the best of friends but we just get each other, very much.

fave fb status: the first man that started milking cows i think was a pervert...what the heck was he doing in the first place?

fave twitter update: The world continues to get smaller and smaller making me claustrophobic and the lines connecting us are starting to Strangle me.

i hope you have a very wonderful weekend. have fun, eat fruit, and sleep extremely well.

41 comments:

Quaggar said...

Where d heck do u get these fb status msgs frm? Lol.. i'm so stealin this!

Nice post. Can relate to these...

blogoratti said...

Nice weekend yea*

24yearOldTeEnAgeR said...

Very Tolerant Friend i like to think i am. But, i just can't stand judgemental people...People that always always see the worst in people. And think they're better than everyone. *shudder* i hate hate! peeps like that.
Lol@Fb status on the being claustrophobic...i'm laughing out literally...funny..butstrangely and freakishly true. ;p

2cute4u said...

Quite a tall order don't you think? for me I just want friends who can be friends.. that's all, just be there..Everyone has faults.. you tolerate them, That's why you're a friend.. you don't pick what you want and chuck the rest out of the window, you take the whole baggage in.. (my thoughts)
I'd say the only problem I have is deceit.. plus as a friend , when you do what I don't like I tell you and we are still friends..
www.askchacha4free.blogspot.com

Myne Whitman said...

Like 24yr old, I can't call a judgmental person a close friend. We can't all be the same and I should know.

Suru said...

I like the twitter status... It's great to have friends and I can't stand when people are fake. Please check out http://helpnigeria.blogspot.com/

shorty said...

I can't be friends with someone that is arrogant,can't stand them. I can't stand a judgmental person too.

Lol@ facebook status.

neefemi said...

i love the twitter status, cos i said sumn like that the other day...can't stand gossips and people with self esteem period, don't talk to them

neefemi said...

o and i totally agree with 2cute4u, i don't pick my friends it just happens, but i guess my point is in general i cant stand gossips and people with low self esteem

leggy said...

@2cute4u...i pick my friends..i dont let every tom, dick and harry into my life.i cant let someone be gossiping with my name and backstabbing me then ill just turn around and say..'i dont like the fact that you are doing this but we are still friends'.this is the real world abeg and im not a saint.i cant stand these traits in people i call friends and i dont call people with these traits my friends period.

Rene said...

i can't stand friends who are too extraordinary full of themselves and the ones that are never satisfied with who they are.
I can't stand a friend that take all I say too seriously

JuaNita said...

Yep, judgemental, the serious and the low self esteemed..nah. I'd prefer peeps who seem like me in one way or the other..but I can't pick them..they just pop out of nowhere.

F and M said...

I agree wholeheartedly with the point about people with low self-esteem. We all have our issues but have to learn to deal with them somehow. I no fit carry double load- ur problem plus my own... Na by force? Constantly reassuring someone of their worth is draining; friendship is never supposed to be that way.

Bubbles said...

ahn ahn
na so una dey choose friends?
ok o

TayneMent said...

Wow, everyone seems to be on some high horse.

Anywho, I don't pick friends per se, noone is perfect, so as long as your good outweighs the bad and I can handle the bad.I'm good. Personally, if a friend of mine has low self esteem but when I am in need, he/she has my back I am not disqualifying them as a friend.

Have a good weekend!

chayoma said...

Okay, so usually i dnt pick up friends like out of a hat or smthin, but i dnt keep peeps (as friends) who do EYE SERVICE. it's like lying, gossiping, FAKE, all that ish rolled in one...that is a NO NO!

Fragilelooks said...

Malice is so useless. Why r we frends if we cnt argue and get past it. GOSSIP IS A NO NO 4 ME. NLY INSECURE PPLE DO DAT. I CNT EVEN STAND WHERE PPLE SIT AND RUM ANODA DOWN. I LOVE TAT FB STATUS. DO AVE A GUD WKEND.

Sumptuous said...

Leggy! Haba! Ur standards are high sha. But remember everyone has got issues and tolerance makes friendship thick. Just my take though.

Mr.Funnyhoneymoney said...

Well i dont have no preferences for friends so long you like me,i like you and we on the same level of mutual understanding of each other then we can be friends but then again im just 17 n relatively young so there aint really much happened in me life to make me picky
as for the milkman he probably woulda died of food poisoning from expired milk lmao

muyiwa said...

Nice one,have a nice weekend

NBB said...

I love people who are very real! Lol at ur fave fb status and i always wonder where u get them. Tell me you write them all.

Sugarking said...

Well, I think I've said this on my blog b4, I despise people that get high but would never buy. I.e. They only seem to know when I have some weed, then come over and smoke it all up. To commot money buy make we smoke na problem. Mcheeeewww!

P.s. Em, not trying to start any beef o, but I one kind, don't like people that choose to respond to selected comments on their blogs. E come b like say the others dey yarn dust. You know who I mean abi? lol

leggy said...

lol@surgarking...no beef oh.i only commented on that one cos she misunderstood this post and i wanted to set her straight.

missanonyme said...

i m pretty tolerant cos i m aware i ve my own set of faults but i totally agree wiv u concerning malice keepers n overly sensitive people...

Mwajim Al said...

It takes me a while to call someone a friend... i can't stand someone isn't trust worthy, not only in backbiting but interms of integrity in whatever they do... I used to have a friend whom we called eachother sisters only to find out she had been stealing from me and backbiting... that hurt which is why it takes me a while to call someone a friend. When i do call them a friend, its friends for a whileeeeeeeee.

~Sirius~ said...

Friends...not a fan.

I have less than 5.
Funny I never had to think about qualities.....Maybe that has a lot to do with my mentality about "human beings".......Unpredictable.

It's either I flowed with the person or not.

2cute4u said...

Hmmm.
@ Leggy.. point taken..I understood your post though.
@Sugarking.. Abi? Lol..
Please check out http://helpnigeria.blogspot.com
Thank you so very much
www.askchacha4free.blogspot.com

NKAYTCHEE said...

i can't stand PARASITIC friends, .i.e friends who r just there to feed on u n never contribute any positive thing at all to d friendship......

Tisha said...

whats i with friends.
i wrote a lovely post on friends and who and who could be my friend but its disappeared.
loyalty is a big deal for me and also ability to be consistent.
you can't say good things about me one moment and say bad things the next. you just won't be my friend, i won't let you.

Fierce said...

Okay so I have insane OCD for proper grammar so I don't think I could be friends with someone who couldn't speak proper English. Weird, I know. Oh and I think you just about covered everything else but there's also the matter of friends who try to one-up you in everything. You know, those girls that always want to be better than you in everything even though you weren't competing to start? Yes, those ones. I think those are my major 'friend peeves'

:)
xoxo

MsMarcus said...

Interesting post ms.


Hope u had a great wkd too.

Keep it up!

histreasure said...

i think it's right to be careful of who is close to u , i definitely am..i blend and flow with you and give u a chance until u prove urself otherwise

and loyalty is a big thing for me, and i have friends from way back with whom i am still best friends..i guess that says a lot

Tisha said...

yeah, i would rather have a 100 real enemies than one fake friends cos then you know where you stand with them.

Single ~Girl~ Swag. said...

i normally hardly comment on blog posts buh dis i can totally relate to...u jst spilled it out exactly like i would ! Nd i fink ama steal dis fb status!

Imoteda said...

LOL @ the fb status. I often wonder about our sources of food. Like who the heck was walking in a field saw a potato underground and decided to eat it? Imagine the trial and error it took to realize they should be cooked first.

Sigh at overly sensitive people. I just hate those.

Issey, Alice, Uche said...

Guess I am quite a tolerant friend...and it is quite a task....I can never stand lying friends and self absorbed friends......they end up floating away like balloons in the wind and I let the strings go happily....

have u checked out cupidsgift.blogspot.com

The Girl with the Red Hair said...

I can't stand judgemental people, liars, gossips and self absorbed friends.

Azazel said...

Lol interesting post..

Andrea said...

I cant stand friends who think they are all that and friends who put other people down. Nice post.

Nogo Blogs said...

I hate liars too. I completely agree with you on that. And I hate people who say they will do something, then don't. But its so similar to lying that they're probably the same thing... Lol

But to be honest low self-esteem I can handle to a certain point. I got that issue too from time to time. But I hear you Lol

LovePaprika said...

LOVE LOVE LOVE FB status!
LOVE LOVE LOVE twitter update more!!!!!

OK so FRIENDS! HMM

Liars and Gossips do it for me... As for low esteem and sensitivity esp... I can tolerate to an extent. I believe in helping people grow and I believe people should help me grow as well... Thatz what friendship is about! I think I am a bit bossy or rather 'manipulative' tho... and its a flaw I have learnt to embrace rather than dispose of...