Thursday, June 3, 2010

the other woman



forgive me father for i have sinned...

i really do love him
despite all the missed holidays, the times stuck at home and the unreturned phone calls
despite the broken promises and the wish that he would just leave her
despite five years of loving him
five years of watching him love her
five years of stolen kisses, sighed conversation, lost memories, uncried tears
uncried tears...i never cry.
the happy memories fill in the cracks of our relationship.
the few happy moments fuel my tide and carry me through
i am the other woman and i watch him love her
twisted with fury but bound inside by love
love?
that ever so pure quality,that ever so gentle quality...
soiled by the acts between the sheets
when he is wrapped all around me and i can feel his breath heave and his heart beat speed up.
his nails tear into my back with passion while his tongue sears mine in rage
in that 10 minutes of raw human passion;
i can pretend
i can pretend that i'm the only one
that when he looks at me, it's actually me he sees
hope...?
it fuels my heart
i spend my time hoping that maybe tonight he will fall in love with me
but i keep hoping that every time we spend together..
he falls a little each time
hopefully.
i stare at him naked in bed as he scrambles for his clothes
he looks at me for a minute as he drops some money on the bed and tells me he loves me
i know what you are thinking...
whore...?
maybe one day i'll get the strength to leave
maybe one day i'd have enough
of watching him love her
maybe one day he'd get tired of watching me, watching him love her
as the society tears me apart
with ridicules and finger pointing..
i walk with my head upright as i march through this life assigned to me
you may not understand,
you may shake your head and judge me
but i still stand and hope he'd love me
it might happened today,
it might happen tomorrow..
might never happen
but i wait...
heart filled with love and rage,
waiting patiently,
i'm the other woman...
don't judge me...
i've done enough judging myself.

hey blogville, long time. i can't say i've been busy cos i haven't.i've just been too lazy to write.
anyway, i used to like a friend of mine who had a girlfriend back in high school, i never acted on it but sometimes, i used to feel like the other woman.thats what inspired this post.
so have you ever liked someone who liked someone else?do share.

p.s:thanks for nominating me for the nigerian bloggers' award..i appreciate it.this might sound cliche but it really is just an honor to be nominated, that's why i haven't campaigned for votes or anything.just thanks for nominating me.love.

fave fb quote: When you kiss, take your time; savor the moment and enjoy the connection..

21 comments:

YankeeNaija said...

great post. just, wow.

Tega said...

This post really hit close to home for me...am still here...there...and I totally get it

Lovely post.

TayneMent said...

Been there..Nicely written.

miss.fab said...

very well written, leggy. i watch my some of my close friends go through this everyday. i haven't crushed on an unavailable man in years though

Afrodiṣiac said...

I was actually with a guy a few months back who had another girl that he loved. I thank God for giving me the strength to walk away. I'm still trying to get over him but decided I'de rather be alone that share my man with someone else.
Great post.

Harry said...

This is really nice..

Blogoratti said...

Dunno if I've been there...but best thing is always to walk away.
How are you?

Unknown said...

This had me smiling.. and for what reason, I do not know..You really described the yearnings of a mistress, very much like unrequited love. you should see my poem on that.. I totally loved this..
Shows the futility and despair..

histreasure said...

this was quite deep..i must say it's not surprising as you are one insightful young lady.
like 2cute4u said, you can totally sense the futility and despair..

The Girl with the Red Hair said...

Ths is deep, can so relate to this, been the other woman and I say don't judge me "i've done enough judging myself"

Anonymous said...

This was really well written. I can safely say I have liked someone I shouldn't have... Let's leave it at that. The final lines were powerful as well- this is one of my favourites of all the pieces I have seen from you.

Spesh said...

the title got me smiling...and then I read it,wow!

I guess we all had a crush on someone at some point :-))

Adamma said...

right now i have the deepest crush ever since the beginning of time on my frien..it hurts so much..plus he has a girlfriend who he just wont stop talking about.anyway,i love your blog so much, wish i had the talent to write this good

Azazel said...

ur talent can never be called into question leggy

miss b said...

where hav u been now?? am nt feeling ds ur sparse blogging oh!

Miss Natural said...

Been there and its terrible. honestly. It takes the grace of God to pull yourself together and walk away. plus I believe what goes round comes round. Azazel said it very well leggy.

Anonymous said...

*CLAPPING*...beautifully written..i felt the passion, wanting & longing...congrat on your nomination

Unknown said...

I hate being the other woman
I just knew
that second best is not for me
ever...

i don't do things in halves
you wrote it nicely

'girls are stupid' is my BFF's fav comment.

Myne said...

The closest I also came was having a crush. Nice devil's advocate you played here, I loved the write-up.

BSNC said...

congrats on winning again.
Don't we all go through this at a point in our live. I love him, but he loves her, but she in turn loves somebody else.

Unknown said...

cool...